Havening Techniques® for Trauma and Anxiety

Sometimes you can understand why you feel the way you do and still find that certain experiences carry more emotional weight than you want them to.

Havening Techniques® is a gentle, touch-based approach that I sometimes incorporate into trauma therapy to help reduce the emotional intensity associated with difficult experiences. It combines soothing touch with focused attention and other simple cognitive techniques.

I use Havening with adults and adolescents throughout California who are working with trauma, anxiety, grief, difficult relationships, and experiences that continue to affect how they feel about themselves.

What Havening Techniques® is like

Havening uses gentle, repetitive touch on the hands, arms, or face. In therapy, I can guide you through the process, or you can apply the touch yourself.

You remain aware and in control throughout. We can slow down, pause, talk, or change direction at any point.

One reason I value Havening is that it gives us another way to work when talking and insight aren't enough. Rather than relying entirely on words, we can also work with the emotional and physical responses that can remain connected to an experience long after it is over.

You don't have to tell every detail

Like EMDR, Havening does not necessarily require you to describe a difficult or traumatic experience in detail.

We need enough information to understand what we're working with, but you don't have to tell me everything that happened for us to work with the emotional response connected to it.

For some people, this makes Havening particularly useful for experiences that feel difficult to put into words, too private to discuss extensively, or simply exhausting to keep retelling.

Havening and EMDR

I am certified in both Havening Techniques® and EMDR, and I don't see them as competing approaches. They give us different ways of working with experiences that continue to carry emotional weight.

EMDR uses bilateral stimulation while working with memories, beliefs, emotions, and body sensations. Havening uses soothing touch along with attention and cognitive techniques.

Which approach I use depends on you, what we're working on, and how you respond. Sometimes one method is clearly a better fit. At other times, I may draw from both—or use neither.

The goal isn't to fit you into a particular method. It's to have enough options that the therapy can respond to what you actually need.

When Havening may be useful

I may incorporate Havening when we're working with experiences that continue to evoke anxiety, shame, fear, grief, anger, or other strong emotional responses.

It can also be useful when certain situations trigger reactions that feel disproportionate to what's happening now, or when an old experience continues to carry more emotional intensity than you would like.

For some clients, Havening also becomes a simple self-soothing practice they can use outside of therapy when they feel overwhelmed or activated.

What Havening with me is like

I don't use Havening the same way with every person or in every session.

We begin by understanding what is bringing you to therapy, what you want to change, and what may be getting in the way. Sometimes Havening becomes part of deeper trauma work; at other times, I may use it to help settle an emotional response, create some distance from something painful, or give you something concrete to use between sessions.

My approach is collaborative and active. I'll pay attention to how you're responding, offer feedback, and adjust what we're doing as we go. You don't need to perform therapy correctly or force yourself through something because a particular technique says you should.

The method matters, but so does having enough safety and trust in the therapeutic relationship to do meaningful work.

Is Havening right for you?

Havening may be worth considering if you've done a great deal of thinking, talking, or therapy and find that some reactions or experiences haven't shifted as much as you hoped.

You don't need to know which kind of therapy you need before contacting me. During a complimentary 30-minute consultation, we can talk about what you're experiencing, what has and hasn't helped before, and whether my approach may be a good fit.